3 New Rules For A Successful Marriage

Kishana Highgate PhotographyWe’ve all heard of these rules on how to have a successful marriage, but I’m not really sure that I agree with a lot of them that are out there.  Below are my thoughts on some of these rules for a successful marriage.


Old Rule#1: Never go to bed angry.  Countless times,  you have heard that you should hash out the situation before going to bed.  Well let’s be real, raise your hand if you’ve ever gone to bed angry.  Yup, my hand is raised along with all of you.

New Rule #1 Get a good night’s sleep, and then reconvene.  For some of us, it takes a little bit longer to cool down than others.  And if the disagreement started late in the evening, the chances of you making up before you go to bed are slim.  My husband tells me all the time that  I act like a man in our relationship when it comes to arguments.  He says that when I am upset, I retreat into my “cave” and when I feel like talking I come out of my cave. LOL!  I thought that was pretty funny because he is 100% right.  I just never thought of it in the same way he does.  LOL. But it is true, sometimes I just need a good nights sleep and then I am more open to communicate about the situation.


Old Rule #2: As you grow older, sex simply won’t matter to you and your spouse. How many times have you heard people say that your libido goes away the older you get, or after you have children?  But is that you?  Is that your current situation?  Ummmm……I completely disagree on this one.

New Rule#2  It is fun and exciting to try new things in the bedroom.  Each year we’ve been together we have become closer and closer.  There is no reason why you wouldn’t grow more sexually connected.  Matter of fact, I read a great article written from a male point of view about how men view sex.  Read it here. I come from the belief system that thoughts become things. Don’t let people write a death sentence on you sex life with your spouse simply because you’ve gotten a little older and wiser.


Old Rule# 3 Now that you two are married, you should do everything together. Although in the beginning, you two are pretty inseparable.  But, I think this is a myth.

New Rule#3 A little autonomy never hurts.  Just because you are married doesn’t mean that you have to lose yourself. My husband goes on “guys” trips and I go on “girls” trips.  It’s healthy to maintain some of the friendships you had prior to getting married. As well as, it gives you an opportunity to put your phone down at dinner and actually converse with your spouse about your day.


Of course, these rules are just my opinion. I welcome any other old rules that have been replaced with new rules in your relationship!




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